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The Phrase “No S#%t” Comes to Mind

August 10, 2011

I like things to be neat and orderly as much as the next person (as long as the next person thinks anal-retentive isn’t a bad word), but even I will admit that you can go too far when it comes to organization. So when I found myself staring at a couple of images in this Better Homes and Garden’s slideshow on organizing, I realized I was staring in disbelief – and not in a I-have-to-have-it way.

Take this example. Now, I know that there are lots of busy people out there and there are always things to keep track of in regards to children’s activities, but I just think a life that requires this setup is just wrong.

Do children need an “in” and an “out” box (or plastic envelope)? With two daughters, will our schedules some day require a system that takes up an entire wall in our dining room? Hopefully by then Nick and I will have graduated to a smartphone from the below-averagephones we have now.

Anyway, after the organizing slideshow I started looking at a slideshow about “free printable storage labels.” Not sure why I ventured down this road because we’re too cheap to buy ink for our printer, so I would have to print these labels off at work and I make it a habit to not print personal items at work (except for concert tickets, recipes, house fliers, recipes, and organizing tips). But if a person needs to label the things that BHG decided to label, then there are bigger issues at play here.

Example #1. You need to label a basket full of flip-flops? Isn’t it obvious what’s in the basket?  I want to live where a person typically owns that many flip-flops.

 

Example #2. Thank GOD you labeled this clear jar full of jelly beans. I had no idea what I was getting myself into!

Same comment goes for this one.

Example #3. Is it baby “items” or baby “stuff”? WHICH IS IT??? How do I decide?

Finally, we come to the ultimate in “do people really do that?”

I believe people who can plan their meals a week at a time have genius IQ. I go to the store and firmly believe I succeeded in buying food for several meals. Technically I did succeed – if those meals consist of tortillas, yogurt, and Honey Nut Cheerios. I think I have actually picked up ingredients for Chicken Tikka Masala and forgotten the chicken. How do they do it, these weekly meal planners?

I have so many questions about how a life like this must be like.

“Mom, the board says we’re having fruit salad with the omelets – can we have yogurt instead?”

“Potato soup and chef salad again?”

“I want cheese pizza, but the board has pizza under Meat. What gives?”

And whoever heard about having peaches with chicken pot pie? That’s just weird.

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